html
{
margin: 0;
/* setting border: 0 hoses ie6 win window inner well border */
padding: 0;
}
body
{
margin: 0;
/* setting border: 0 hoses ie5 win window inner well border */
padding: 0;
font-family: verdana, 'trebuchet ms', sans-serif;
font-size: 12px;
}
form { margin: 0; padding: 0; }
a { text-decoration: underline; }
a img { border: 0; }
h1, h2, h3, h4, h5, h6 { font-weight: normal; }
h1, h2, h3, h4, h5, h6, p, ol, ul, pre, blockquote
{
margin-top: 10px;
margin-bottom: 10px;
}
/* standard helper classes */
.clr
{
clear: both;
overflow: hidden;
width: 1px;
height: 1px;
margin: 0 -1px -1px 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
font-size: 0;
line-height: 0;
}
/* .pkg class wraps enclosing block element around inner floated elements */
.pkg:after
{
content: " ";
display: block;
visibility: hidden;
clear: both;
height: 0.1px;
font-size: 0.1em;
line-height: 0;
}
* html .pkg { display: inline-block; }
/* no ie mac \*/
* html .pkg { height: 1%; }
.pkg { display: block; }
/* */
/* page layout */
body { text-align: center; } /* center on ie */
#container
{
position: relative;
margin: 0 auto; /* center on everything else */
width: 902px;
text-align: left;
}
#container-inner { position: static; width: auto; }
#banner { position: relative; }
#banner-inner { position: static; }
#pagebody { position: relative; width: 100%; }
#pagebody-inner { position: static; width: 100%; }
#alpha, #beta, #gamma, #delta
{
display: inline; /* ie win bugfix */
position: relative;
float: left;
min-height: 1px;
}
#delta { float: right; }
#alpha-inner, #beta-inner, #gamma-inner, #delta-inner
{
position: static;
}
/* banner user/photo */
.banner-user
{
float: left;
overflow: hidden;
width: 64px;
margin: 0 15px 0 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
text-align: center;
}
.banner-user-photo
{
display: block;
margin: 0 0 2px 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
background-position: center center;
background-repeat: no-repeat;
text-decoration: none !important;
}
.banner-user-photo img
{
width: 64px;
height: auto;
margin: 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
}
/* content */
.content-nav
{
margin: 10px;
text-align: center;
}
.date-header,
.entry-content
{
position: static;
clear: both;
}
.entry,
.trackbacks,
.comments,
.archive
{
position: static;
overflow: hidden;
clear: both;
width: 100%;
margin-bottom: 20px;
}
.entry-content,
.trackbacks-info,
.trackback-content,
.comment-content,
.comments-open-content,
.comments-closed
{
clear: both;
margin: 5px 10px;
}
.entry-excerpt,
.entry-body,
.entry-more-link,
.entry-more
{
clear: both;
}
.entry-footer,
.trackback-footer,
.comment-footer,
.comments-open-footer,
.archive-content
{
clear: both;
margin: 5px 10px 20px 10px;
}
.comments-open label { display: block; }
#comment-author, #comment-email, #comment-url, #comment-text
{
width: 240px;
}
#comment-bake-cookie
{
margin-left: 0;
vertical-align: middle;
}
#comment-post
{
font-weight: bold;
}
img.image-full { width: 100%; }
.image-thumbnail
{
float: left;
width: 115px;
margin: 0 10px 10px 0;
}
.image-thumbnail img
{
width: 115px;
height: 115px;
margin: 0 0 2px 0;
}
/* modules */
.module
{
position: relative;
overflow: hidden;
width: 100%;
}
.module-content
{
position: relative;
margin: 5px 10px 20px 10px;
}
.module-list,
.archive-list
{
margin: 0;
padding: 0;
list-style: none;
}
.module-list-item
{
margin-top: 5px;
margin-bottom: 5px;
}
.module-presence img { vertical-align: middle; }
.module-powered .module-content { margin-bottom: 10px; }
.module-photo .module-content { text-align: center; }
.module-wishlist .module-content { text-align: center; }
.module-calendar .module-content table
{
border-collapse: collapse;
}
.module-calendar .module-content th,
.module-calendar .module-content td
{
width: 14%;
text-align: center;
}
.typelist-thumbnailed { margin: 0 0 20px 0; }
.typelist-thumbnailed .module-list-item
{
display: block;
clear: both;
margin: 0;
}
/* positioniseverything.net/easyclearing.html */
.typelist-thumbnailed .module-list-item:after
{
content: " ";
display: block;
visibility: hidden;
clear: both;
height: 0.1px;
font-size: 0.1em;
line-height: 0;
}
* html .typelist-thumbnailed .module-list-item { display: inline-block; }
/* no ie mac \*/
* html .typelist-thumbnailed .module-list-item { height: 1%; }
.typelist-thumbnailed .module-list-item { display: block; }
/* */
.typelist-thumbnail
{
float: left;
min-width: 60px;
width: 60px;
/* no ie mac \*/width: auto;/* */
margin: 0 5px 0 0;
text-align: center;
vertical-align: middle;
}
.typelist-thumbnail img { margin: 5px; }
.module-galleries .typelist-thumbnail img { width: 50px; }
.typelist-description
{
margin: 0;
padding: 5px;
}
.module-featured-photo .module-content,
.module-photo .module-content
{
margin: 0;
}
.module-featured-photo img { width: 100%; }
.module-recent-photos { margin: 0 0 15px 0; }
.module-recent-photos .module-content { margin: 0; }
.module-recent-photos .module-list
{
display: block;
height: 1%;
margin: 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
list-style: none;
}
/* positioniseverything.net/easyclearing.html */
.module-recent-photos .module-list:after
{
content: " ";
display: block;
visibility: hidden;
clear: both;
height: 0.1px;
font-size: 0.1em;
line-height: 0;
}
* html .module-recent-photos .module-list { display: inline-block; }
/* no ie mac \*/
* html .module-recent-photos .module-list { height: 1%; }
.module-recent-photos .module-list { display: block; }
/* */
.module-recent-photos .module-list-item
{
display: block;
float: left;
/* ie win fix \*/ height: 1%; /**/
margin: 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
}
.module-recent-photos .module-list-item a
{
display: block;
margin: 0;
border: 0;
padding: 0;
}
.module-recent-photos .module-list-item img
{
width: 60px;
height: 60px;
margin: 0;
padding: 0;
}
/* mmt calendar */
.module-mmt-calendar { margin-bottom: 15px; }
.module-mmt-calendar .module-content { margin: 0; }
.module-mmt-calendar .module-header { margin: 0; }
.module-mmt-calendar .module-header a { text-decoration: none; }
.module-mmt-calendar table { width: 100%; }
.module-mmt-calendar th { text-align: left; }
.module-mmt-calendar td
{
width: 14%;
height: 75px;
text-align: left;
vertical-align: top;
}
.day-photo
{
width: 54px;
height: 54px;
}
.day-photo a
{
display: block;
}
.day-photo a img
{
width: 50px;
height: 50px;
}
/* * theme * */
/* basic page elements */
body
{
font-family: 'trebuchet ms', verdana, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;
font-size: 12px;
}
a { color: #36414d; text-decoration: underline; }
a:hover { color: #CCCC99; }
#banner a { color: #FFFFFF; text-decoration: none; }
#banner a:hover { color: #FFFFFF; }
h1, h2, h3, h4, h5, h6
{
font-family: 'trebuchet ms', verdana, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;
}
.module-header,
.trackbacks-header,
.comments-header,
.comments-open-header,
.archive-header
{
/* ie win (5, 5.5, 6) bugfix */
p\osition: relative;
width: 100%;
w\idth: auto;
margin: 0;
border-top: 2px solid #660066;
border-right: 2px none #660066;
border-bottom: 2px solid #660066;
border-left: 2px none #CCCC99;
padding: 5px;
color: #660066;
background: #FFFFFF;
font-size: small;
font-weight:bold; line-height: 1;
}
.module-header a,
.module-header a:hover,
.trackbacks-header a,
.trackbacks-header a:hover,
.comments-header a,
.comments-header a:hover,
.comments-open-header a,
.comments-open-header a:hover
.archive-header a,
.archive-header a:hover
{
color: #660066;
}
.entry-more-link,
.entry-footer,
.comment-footer,
.trackback-footer,
.typelist-thumbnailed
{
font-size: px;
}
/* page layout */
body
{
min-width: 902px;
color: #CCCC99;
background: #CCCC99;
background-image: url("http://"); background-repeat: repeat-x;
}
#container
{
width:90%; margin-bottom: 20px;
background: #FFFFFF;
}
#container-inner
{
border-right: 5px solid #292E33;
border-bottom: 5px solid #292E33;
border-left: 5px solid #000000;
}
#banner
{
width: 100%;
padding: 50px
background-color: #CCCC99;
background-image: url("http://www.threekidcircus.com/test/mblegsheader.jpg"); background-repeat: no-repeat;
height: 191px;
}
#banner-inner
{
padding: 15px 13px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-left: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
#banner-header
{
margin: 0;
font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;
color: #660066;
font-size: small;
text-align: left;
font-weight:bold; line-height: 1;
}
#banner-description
{
margin-top: 5px;
margin-bottom: 0;
font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;
color: #660066;
font-size: small;
text-align: center;
font-weight:bold; background: none;
line-height: 1.125;
}
#alpha { float:left; margin: 0px 15px 0 15px; width:23%; background: #FFFFFF; background-repeat: no-repeat;
}
#beta { float:right; width:70%; background: transparent; }
#gamma, #delta { float:right; width:20%; background: transparent; }
#beta-inner,
#gamma-inner,
#delta-inner
{
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-width: 2px 2px 2px 0;
border-style: solid;
border-color: #fff;
}
#alpha-inner {
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
#beta-inner {
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
#gamma-inner {
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
.date-header
{
margin-top: 0;
background: #FFFFFF;
font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Verdana, sans-serif;
text-align:left;
color: #660066;
font-size: x-small;
font-weight:bold;text-transform:uppercase;
}
.entry-header
{
margin-top: 0;
background: #FFFFFF;
font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;
text-align:left;
color: #666666;
font-size: small;
font-weight:bold; padding: 5px;
border-left: 5px solid #CCCC99;
}
.entry-content,
.comment-content,
.trackback-content
{
background: #FFFFFF;
font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Verdana, sans-serif;
text-align:left;
color: #333333;
font-size: small;
margin: 0;
line-height: 1.5;
}
.entry-footer,
.comment-footer,
.trackback-footer
{
background: #FFFFFF;
margin: 0 0 20px 0;
font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Verdana, sans-serif;
text-align:right;
color: #666666;
font-size: x-small;
border-top: 1px solid #dae0e6;
}
.comment-content,
.trackback-content,
.comment-footer,
.trackback-footer
{
margin-left: 10px;
}
.content-nav { margin-top: 0; }
#trackbacks-info
{
margin: 10px 0;
border: 1px dashed #a3b8cc;
padding: 0 10px;
color: #292e33;
font-size: 11px;
background: #e6ecf2;
}
.comments-open-footer
{
margin: 10px 0;
}
/* modules */
.module
{
margin: 0 0 10px 0;
}
.module-content
{
margin: 0 0 10px 0;
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
line-height: 1.2;
background: #CCCC99;
font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Verdana, sans-serif;
text-align:left;
color: #333333;
font-size: x-small;
border-top: 1px solid #cfd4d9;
}
.module-calendar .module-content { margin: 5px 0 15px 0; }
.module-mmt-calendar .module-content table,
.module-calendar .module-content table
{
font-size: 10px;
}
.module-powered { border-width: 0; }
.module-powered .module-content
{
margin-bottom: 0;
padding-bottom: 10px;
background: #FFFFFF;
font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Verdana, sans-serif;
text-align:left;
color: #292e33;
font-size: x-small;
border-top: 1px dashed #CCCC99;
border-right: 1px dashed #CCCC99;
border-bottom: 1px dashed #CCCC99;
border-left: 1px dashed #CCCC99;
}
.module-photo { background: none; }
.module-photo img { border: solid 1px #fff; }
.module-list
{
margin: 0 15px 10px 15px;
list-style: disc;
}
.module-list .module-list
{
margin: 5px 0 0 0;
padding-left: 15px;
list-style: circle;
}
.module-list-item
{
margin-top: 0;
color: #666;
line-height: 1.2;
}
.module-search input { font-size: 10px; }
.module-search #search { width: 100px; }
.module-photo img { border: 3px solid #fff; }
/* comments */
textarea[id="comment-text"] { width: 80%; }
.commenter-profile img
{
vertical-align: middle;
border-width: 0;
}
/* one-column tweaks */
.layout-one-column body { min-width: 520px; }
.layout-one-column #container { width:90%; }
.layout-one-column #banner { width: 100%; } /* necessary for ie win */
/* two-column-left tweaks */
.layout-two-column-left #alpha
{
margin: 0;
width:23%; background: transparent;
float:left;
}
.layout-two-column-left #alpha-inner
{
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
.layout-two-column-left #beta
{
float:right;
margin: 15px 15px 0 15px;
width:65%; background: #FFFFFF;
}
.layout-two-column-left #beta-inner
{
padding: 0;
border-width: 0;
}
/* three-column tweaks */
.layout-three-column #alpha
{
margin: 0;
width:20%; background: transparent;
float:left;
}
.layout-three-column #alpha-inner
{
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
.layout-three-column #beta
{
float:left;
margin: 15px 15px 0 15px;
width:50%; background: #FFFFFF;
}
.layout-three-column #beta-inner
{
padding: 0;
border-width: 0;
}
.layout-three-column #gamma
{
margin: 0;
width:20%; background: transparent;
float:right;
}
.layout-three-column #gamma-inner
{
padding: 10px 10px 0 10px;
border-top: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-right: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
border-bottom: 2px solid #FFFFFF;
}
« Mommybloggers Dish With Yvonne Marie |
Main
| Anatomically Correct »
Today at Mommybloggers, we turn the site over to Y, who treats us to a favorite from the archives of Joy Unexpected. Enjoy!
I tried to come up with something original for my guest post, but after sitting here for TWO HOURS, it became clear to me that my brain didn't want to cooperate. My back started to ache, and I started to say The "F" word a lot.
(Oh my GOD, she's a mom and she says THE "F" WORD? The horror!)
As much as I didn't want to do this, as much as I told myself that it's TOTALLY CHEATING to do this, I have decided to use a post from my archives.
I couldn't decide whether to go with ""The Serious", The Cheese or The Master Impersonator. In the end, I decided to go with The Poop.
"Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this"
Gabby's naptime is also known around these parts as Time To Do Everything You Can't Do While She's Awake. That's when I'll shower, do laundry, pay bills, check my email, write something, read something, and occassionally, take a dump.
I say "occassionally" because I'm not very "regular" I can go DAYS people.
Today, I was happy to "feel the urge" and decided that I would make a visit to the bathroom as soon as I layed Gabby down. It didn't work out that way because the urge went away, so I called my sister instead.
Twenty minutes later, The Boss Of Me woke up and instantly, The Urge came back. Dang it!
I couldn't hold it til the next nap, so I was forced to come up with a plan on how to take a dump while the girl was awake.
I decided to set her bouncy seat in the doorway and leave her there whilst I did my business.
I was a little uncomfortable at first, which is weird, considering I shit a little during the birth of all three of my babies. Yeah, that's right, they don't tell you about The Birth Poopie during childbirth classes. I'll never forget that moment as long as I live. Pushing my first baby out and screaming "I THINK I WENT POOP" and the nurse telling me "No, you didn't, keep pushing!" WHILE SHE WAS WIPING MY ASS. I'm so glad we captured that moment on FILM.
I got over my discomfort pretty quickly and proceeded to take my dump while my daughter jumped, laughed and waved "hi" to me. I sat there on the toilet, waving back and clapping all the while doing my business.
The moment went from slightly odd to TOTALLY AWESOME when Gabby got quiet and I heard a huge grunt, followed by a severe fart, followed by another grunt.
MY DAUGHTER WAS TAKING A DUMP WITH ME.
I started kicking my legs and shouting "YAY! GABBY'S POOPING WITH MOMMY! YAAAAAAY!" and she started clapping and saying "AYYYYY".
I wanted to leap off The Pot and squeeze her so freaking hard, but, for the love of an unwiped ass, I didn't. . But as soon as I finished My Business and washed my hands (for 30 seconds, like Oprah said!), I picked her up, ran up and down the hall and kissed her stinky little cheeks until I was all puckered out.
(Of course, I changed her diaper as soon as we were done celebrating Our First Simultaneous Poop)
Read more from our hilarious friend Y at her blog, Joy Unexpected.
TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://www.mommybloggers.com/mt/mt-tb.cgi/174
Comments
What a moment!
Posted by: ben | January 31, 2006 4:51 PM
I haven't taken a solo poo in quite some time, maybe years. I miss the days of reading in the bathroom.
The sacrifices a mother makes for her children...
Posted by: Mary | January 31, 2006 10:33 PM
Wow. Poop Post Jinx!
I so love you.
Posted by: mindy | February 1, 2006 4:17 AM
I always just put mine in my lap for the poop. They never seemed to mind the smell. LOL!
30 seconds? O doesn't have children banging at the door and screaming.
Posted by: Carrie | February 1, 2006 7:44 AM
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