I am registering my daughter for kindergarten next week, and I feel like I want to spend more time with her. I do not think moms like us are insane - we just want to cherish this age before they go forward to the next phase.

whew. first of all - i firmly believe that we moms have to come to the decision that is right for us!

that said, i have one child. first and last. finito. i enjoy every second of staying home with her. i do have a sitter 2 days a week so i get some 'me' time; it makes me a better wife and parent.

i think kids really need the social interaction at age 3. if you can have play time with other kids, do the mommy and me classes, etc. then take her out! i would! better to have some structured 'other kid' time than to take her to pre-K and miss her! go to kid yoga! tumbling class! gymnastics! family swim!

my personal feeling is - soon enough she'll be gone half days, then full, then sleep overs ... i plan to have as much time now as is possible and healthy.

i vote keep her and pick your own growth experiences!

I'm a preschool teacher. I'm also a mom. I, too, cherished the time alone with my kids. After teaching preschool as long as I have (nearly a decade), I've come to the conclusion that what you're doing is the best way to approach this.

Kids in an enriched home environment (with books, parent or parents who talk to them, play with them, food secure,etc.) often benefit much more from school blended with family time. I often tell families to go and have that vacation...visit family...whatever. It gets so much harder to do when the kids are all in school.

Sounds like you are realistically balancing your needs, Gabrie's needs and the needs of your family, especially at this time. She needs you, too. It's not weird or strange to keep her home as long as you are able. You're being a good mom.

in my book, you are the sane one! there are things that are meant to be treasured at each and every age, and you are wise to recognize them and make them part of your heart! (from the mom who cries every year when school starts, and reassured all five kids that they don't have to go to school until after labor day.)

Jenn, you of all people know that time with someone you love can be cut short. Unless your daughter would prefer to stay in school, would feel devasted for cutting it short, how could that be a selfish decision? I applaud your desire.

There are only one and a half to two months of school time left this year. How can that short amount time out of school hurt her? Doing all those wonderful things with mom for one last chance would be so worth it.

Great question. Here's how I see it:

1. My folks had four children in six years. Mommy and Daddy-time was the sweetest thing in the world. And there just wasn't enough of them to go around. So what we did have or get was precious. You're allowed to need her too.

2. Sharing and grieving and appreciating is different from leaning on or burdening kids. You're allowed to have feelings.

2. A week of family vacay is a great thing. Now, if G's not back in school by the Fourth, well, let's tawk...

Not selfish at all, and totally understandable. My son has a late summer birthday, so he did a pre-K class last year, versus going to kindergarten. So, you'd think that this year, when he was 6, I would be so ready for it. Well, I was at first, but now that we are in school I see him so little and it makes me sad. I am looking forward to summer a lot, just to have him around more. My daughter starts her MDO program next fall at age 2 and while I am glad to have those few hours a week to get things done, it makes me realize it won't be long until she's in school too. And, that really freaks me out to think about!

I have to work, but if I had my druthers, I would be a SAHM. I understand exactly what you are saying about time slipping away. Take the time to be with your little one -- once that time is gone, it won't come back. She has the rest of her life to spend in school.

I would vote for you to keep her with you. It's not for long, and she's already had the benefit of school. My kids are in day care every day, and I do wonder what I'll I'm missing out on. We do a lot of family trips though.

I come from a different perspective on the whole preschool thing. I didn't do it with my son and because of some learning issues he had, I regret not doing it. My last kiddo is in full blown preschool. I am a huge preschool supporter.

That said, if your heart is telling you to keep her home then keep her home. No one graduates at a lower level from college because they weren't preschooled. ;-)

Gosh, I think if you have the option, you should go for it. I hate not being able to share my days with the little angel. I'd so much prefer to have more time with her. Just make sure some of your fun activities include museums, playdates and other preschool-esque activities.

I think most children have a few many memories of preschool or elementary school, but until they graduate from high school or college they will be overloaded with them. I think there is plenty of time for your child to learn basics and be socialized and not much more time to create special 'with Mommy' memories. I don't doubt that she will recall these memories and want to spend special time with her own children. Seems like a nice tradition you are passing along.

Isn't it always true that when you say - 'oh, I am too tired to preview, I will just post it.' you invariably post gibberish. So, how long you think it will take before I get that? sigh

I am a homeschooling mom of 4 ages 8-4. I can't imagine sending my child off to preschool. My 4 year old sits on the couch with us as we read the Odyssey. We all enjoy spending time together and none of us miss out on each other. My boys are helping teach their younger sisters. I think if you are lucky enough to be a SAHM, then why send your kids away?

I vote for letting her stay with you! They are little for such a short time, and there is plenty to be learned in life from Mommie, and a happy home, and better yet, she's away from all those daycare germs!!!

It wasn't so long ago that pre-school was pretty uncommon. Most people I know my age didn't even go (myself included. I'm 37).

I think now preschool has become the new kindergarten, but I'm not sure that's a good thing. There's a whole unschooling movement here in Portland which makes a lot of sense. My SIL is keeping her DD out of any structured schooling until age 6.

I say keep her home. She gets plenty of socializing with her siblings, and you enjoy her, so really, she's probably better off. Just MHO.

BTW, she's lucky to have a mom who enjoys her so much.

Also, recreating your own childhood is one way of grieving your mom, for sure (I know as I lost mine when she was 53, so she never knew my kids), but it's one of the healthier ways of grieving. So don't worry about it. ((hugs))

Is it selfish? Well you reasoning may very well be. But the simple fact is, selfish or not in your reasoning, you are making a sound decision to invest time in your daughter while you can.

There is no 'tomorrow' (or next year). The flexability afforded to you now will be gone in September (and as you point out for all practicality it disappears in June when the other kids are home).

There is nothing worse than "If only I had..." Take the time with her while you can and ENJOY it.

I recently went through the same issue, trying to decide whether to send my four-year-old to full-time preschool next year. My husband put it this way: "She'll go to school full-time for the next 17-plus years. Let her have a break while she can!"

I don't think its selfish at all. I have three children, all of them have always, from day one had a stay at home father to smack around. While we do get park time, zoo time, and museum time, its not an every day thing. The time that my oldest gets at schol is great for peer bonding, but he's learned much more at home thus far. You, as a parent get to teach your child so many things that in time will change a bit, but the fundementals stay the same.

Most people told me if I didn't send my child to preschool, he'd never learn how to interact with other children. Well, to a degree it was right. On any given day, he has 20 or so friends in the yard at one time. He's not really "one" of them, he's more of the leader. I had the window open lettign in fresh air and I heard his friend say "lets throw those flowers at the girls" My son, being the more responsible of the group said "do you know how long it took my dad to plant those? leave them alone"

my son just turned six. take your time and enjoy your children. before to long they;ll be playing with friends and going to plays, schooling events and so on, you know the routine. I'd bet money you will regret it if you don't.