My daughter Maggie is an Amazon. The child hasn’t been on the growth charts since she was a newborn. She is 19 months and she is the size of a three year old. I have to look no farther than my size eleven feet to figure out where she got it. If my feet don’t convince me, I can then look at my husband Jim’s size 12 longfellows for further evidence of the tall genes in her DNA. I am five feet nine inches, and my baby’s daddy is six feet four inches. We are not small people. And that’s okay, because really, only outhouses have small foundations.

I wonder if it’s easier for mothers of normal sized children to cope with the alarming rate at which toddlers shed their baby-ness. I feel her baby characteristics evaporating a little more every day. Her thighs no longer have those darling precious rolls of baby fat. Her pooh-belly is disappearing. She wears pigtails. I handed her a bottle of milk this morning and she looked at me and said “thank you!� as clear as day. I wonder if I would have an easier time of things if she didn’t grow quite so fast. If she were itty-bitty instead of absolutely ginormous.

Last night I got together with the women in my Bunco group (affectionately referred to as “drunko� by the neighborhood dads) and the hostess held her three month old baby girl in her lap most of the evening as she rolled the dice. Her little baby had on one of those fleece sleep sacks, just like the ones I used to put Maggie to sleep in. Later on, I peeked in her nursery. She was in her crib, zonked out on her back with her arms spread out and her head off to the side, just like my Maggie used to. Memories of my baby days came rushing back, and I found myself overcome with wistfulness. It just went by so FAST. I never got a chance to catch my breath. I want to do it over. I want to take my time. Pay closer attention.

When Maggie was a newborn I was a nervous wreck. I felt like the worlds biggest fake, because I had no clue what I was doing, and the adjustment to motherhood was a difficult one. I felt guilty for not feeling more of a connection with my daughter, and I wondered if I would ever feel like a good mother. Things are so much easier now. I have confidence. Maggie has helped me to learn how to be a good mother, and I would not change a single solitary hair on that child’s head. She is my sweet Amazon baby and I love her more than I ever realized was possible. I love her so much it startles me.

I read once that when you have children, the days are long and the years are short. That is as true a statement as I have ever heard. I know there are so many firsts in her future. Right now is tomorrow’s wistful memory, and I try so hard to pay attention… to not miss anything.

Seeing that baby girl in her little fleece sleep sack made me realize how far we have already come. Part victory, part painful goodbye. Looking on the bright side, I suppose I get more sleep now than I did then. I miss that little baby, but I look at my daughter as she runs across the lawn, and squeals as the dogs lick her face, and I know this is going to be the best summer ever. And anyways, she will always be my sweet little Amazon baby. Always and forever.