The following essay was written by Janeen Armstrong of < destinations > journeys of a restless mind and Diary of a Single Mom on the Edge.

In my living room right now there is a ramp made of an old wooden shelf tilted up onto a puzzle box. It's left over from a couple of days ago when my son and I were sending his latest Lego creation careening across the living room and then skyward. He was very excited to have completed this particular model since we'd had to find the instructions online. Running back and forth between the box of parts and my laptop added an extra element of drama to the construction. Plus, I got to help. I found it surprisingly satisfying to take all those weird shapes and small plastic pieces and put them together bit by bit into something we could race around the living room. Building stuff is fun!

It was kind of like the surprise I felt when we were at a birthday party a coule of years ago and the reptile man came with crates full of snakes and iguanas and lizards. I was delighted by seeing them up close, and even touching and holding them. Sometimes I feel like I've gotten a key to a secret club, being allowed to climb up to the tree house and sit in on a meeting where I'd never been asked to join. Play fighting is a blast. Being a super hero is cool. I like spiders and dinosaurs and bats. I never imagined I could love this boy world so much.

I have to laugh at the woman who freaked out a little bit when she looked down at her newborn and saw a penis. I come from a girly world. Everybody thought I'd have a girl. I have a sister, my mom has a sister, the kidlet's dad has three. Even all those folks who claim they can tell the sex of your baby by the way you are carrying it when you are pregnant predicted a girl. So it's no wonder I was a bit surprised. Luckily, I figured out really quickly how little it mattered.

I've learned some other secrets from my years in the world of boys. I have an entirely new perspective on men, for one thing. Who knew that grown up men were really just boys in bigger bodies? Masculine behaviors that were once mysteries are starting to make sense to me. Even the gruffest man has some sort of endearing little boy trait that he can't entirely snuff out.

I sometimes think my life is a lot like a Lego car with no instructions. At first glance it seems that all I have is a jumble of pieces that make no sense. Pretty soon, though, I learn that I have what I need to figure it out. It doesn't matter that I'm a woman raising a son alone, our worlds are not so different as I might have feared. He can show me how things fit together, I know how to find help. Little by little our car is taking shape. Not only will it beautiful, but watch out, because it goes fast!