My two sons are five years apart.

When D. was born, this proved advantageous. S., who wanted to impress his new little brother, was able to do many things on his own and keen to help with the little one.

Five years later, the age gap presents more of a challenge. A five year old and a ten year old will always be likely to have very disparate interests. This fact is exacerbated by the differences between my two boys and the fact that my youngest knows exactly how (while simultaneously feigning innocence) to get under his brother's skin.

D. is an extremely social child, while his brother is more introverted. Ever since he was tiny, S. has been able to happily amuse himself with a toy, game or book. Not so, D. who always wants to be at the centre of things.

We have been encouraging D. to play on his own (and we have absolutely forbidden him to announce, "Someone needs to entertain me!") but there are times when we force encourage the boys to play together. This generally involves a fair bit of arm-twisting (or, on occasion, bribery) to get the older one to consent. Especially since we explained that this did not mean he could just turn on the TV and leave the room.

For a while, whatever game we would suggest or D. would want to play, S. would try and get his little brother to agree to hide and seek. We became suspicious one day when D. came to report that his brother had been hiding for a very long time. We found him deep in his closet with a flashlight and a book.

One day, this strategy back-fired.

On that occasion, D. had a friend over. S. once again suggested that they play hide and seek. I think he was actually keen to play that time (he is often much more interested in little kids when they are not his brother) but, as S. hid, the little kids quickly lost interest.

Some time later (it could have been as long as forty minutes), the younger boys having moved on to another game, we heard S. calling from somewhere upstairs, "Is anybody going to come and find me?"

You can read more of my writing at Not Just About Cancer.