As I've told you before, I'm an only child.

As a matter of fact, my mother and grandmother were only children, too.

Aside from the whole "small family reunion" thing, a downside to all this only daughter-ness is that I don't always know how boy children work.

My oldest child is a girl. I've been a girl. I "get" the girl thing.

The boy thing?

Not so much.

My middle child, a boy, is nearly 12 years old, and my oldest is a girl.

She's 13 and is a very dominant personality. It is impossible to ignore her, and sometimes I get so caught up with her, that I forget he's growing up, too.

Earlier today, he responded extremely rudely to something I said, so his punishment was that he wasn't allowed to go to the store with his dad and brother to pick out a movie. He had to stay in his room instead.

He is also very, very, very, very, very bull-headed, (has been since he was a wee child) and he still didn't respond appropriately to me when I went to talk to him.

Did I mention the bull-headed part?

Anyway, I went back and explained to him yet again why he was being punished, and yet again he responded inappropriately.

Here I was trying to talk to him to finish it up and let him out of his room, and he would have nothing of it.

I walked away wondering if the hospital had given me the wrong child 11 years ago and then it dawned on me: he's nearly a teenager.

I guess he never ages in my head since I'm often caught up with his sister. Then, I'm surprised when something like this happens and I remember he's no longer 8 years old.

I recognize that I need to do something about that, but I may just toss him out the window, instead.*

Yep, he's almost a teen.

(* No teens or pre-teens were harmed in the making of this post. It is a joke. I wouldn't throw him out the window, who would mow the grass, then?)

Posted by Busy Mom at 7:37 AM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

I'm an only child.

I come from a long line of only children, too, so the whole notion of having brothers and sisters is foreign to me.

My husband is the youngest of four boys, so, he has his own experiences and opinions about siblings.

Now, I have no problem being an only child, even if I did, what would I do about it, anyway? My father steadfastly refuses to give me a sibling, mainly because he's 75, and, my mother died a couple of years ago.

Yeah, I know. But, what about meeeee?

Hey, I'm kidding if you don't know me.

Anyway, I have 3 kids, and, sometimes that amazes me.

I knew I wanted to have more than one child, not because I was unhappy being an only, on the contrary, I think I had a lot of advantages, and, I turned out OK (You? In the 3rd row? Shut up.), but, it's just what I felt was right.

My husband was all for one, possibly two, and, indeed we had the first two twenty months apart, and, all was well.

Or, was it?

He was quite happy, as was I, except, I just had a nagging feeling someone was missing.

I'd bring up the idea of a third child every now and then, and, it would get dismissed, as reality pretty much indicated that it wouldn't be a good idea for a variety of reasons.

Our two children were wonderful, yet, the feeling that someone wasn't at the party persisted, and, I didn't like feeling that way. I wanted to be OK with our family the way it was.

Indeed, I eventually resolved it, and, the notion of more children no longer occupied my admittedly limited brain space.

Until I realized I was indeed pregnant with the third nearly 6 years after my second child.

I'll spare you the details, but, I had a doctor's prescription that severely cut down on the odds of that, but, well, some things were meant to be, I guess. And, no, I would never deliberately do something like that.

After the initial shock wore off, I figured out how this happened.

You see, when my oldest was in kindergarten, I recall standing at the kindergarten picnic talking to a group of mothers whom I realized all had something in common: they each had kindergarteners and high schoolers.

Now, remember, my oldest child was in kindergarten, and, I thought this was hysterical!

I laughed loud. I laughed long.

Who knew that I would be on the same track a mere two years later?

Karma, dude. Karma.

Anyway, though I have no siblings, and, I can't always relate to what it feels like when someone takes your toy, or, what it's like to have to share your parents with someone, I wouldn't have it any other way.

The party is complete.

Posted by Busy Mom at 6:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

The following essay has been written especially for Mommybloggers by Busy Mom. We want to thank her for hanging out and playing with the Mommybloggers this week.

For the longest time, I philosophically resisted the custom of decorating for Christmas immediately after Thanksgiving, but, especially since I’ve had kids, I’ve since subscribed to the “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em� philosophy. I will admit, however, that the act of actually doing the decorating lags behind my philosphy, somewhat. I look at it as having 3 “levels� and we may implement a different level each year. In descending order of effort required, here they are:

Level III: “Full-Out Home Magazine� Mode:

We actually own more Christmas decorations than any one household should, thanks to the year we participated in a Holiday Tour of Homes (long story) and the fact that we used to host Busy Dad’s work party. We were decorating fools, and, no, it didn’t involve random placement of gingerbread men standing watch over the Baby Jesus in the manger in the front yard (not that there’s anything wrong with that, I’m just sayin’…). We ended up spending the equivalent of the GNP of a small country and way more time in a craft store than I’m comfortable with. This “over the top� decorating level included festive swags of real pine with red bows adorning the stair railings and we even decorated the upstairs, where there are, for the most part, only bedrooms and baths. Though it didn’t actually match my lofty vision created by overpriced, shiny magazines, it turned out fairly well and was most enjoyable. But, since it took nearly a month to complete and we had to bribe friends to come help us do it, it’s not practical to repeat that one very often. Friends, they have long memories, you know, and, apparently, my chili isn’t worth the manual labor. (Note to self: find new friends that weren’t involved the first time around)

Level II: “ Let’s Put Stuff in Strategic Areas Causing the Casual Observer to Think We’ve Gone All-Out� Mode:

This stage is implemented during bouts of excessive Christmas cheer but lacking the time to do anything about it. The most-used entrance to our house is the kitchen door, so we usually have the best decorated kitchen, ever, complete with lights and pine swags, etc. People never seem to leave my kitchen even when I want them to, anyway. Done properly, the kitchen decor gives the guest a first impression that we are ever so ready for Christmas to come. A smelly candle of some sort or some decoy potpourri cements the illusion and they assume that the rest of the house is the same. On the rare occasion we let people beyind the kitchen, they are escorted straight to the living room where we have implemented a rather large tree that is meant to be so fetching that you need not look around the rest of the room. This level is good because it can be rapidly executed and receives much fanfare if cdone correctly.

Level I : “I Put a Bow on the Mailbox, DoYou Think We Need To Get a Tree, Too?�:

Yes, there have been years we’ve only made it to Level I, but that was before kids. Kids make it all different and you might oughta (and you want to) do a little more.
Now that Busy Girl is older, she’s wanting to decorate beyond the boundaries and it may force me to declare some sort of new level if she passes my inspection (Control Issues: The Holiday Edition). But maybe that’s not so bad, she gets a kick out of doing it. However, I’ve been unsuccessful in my efforts to get her to specialize in the “Undecorating� Level since it’s not my favorite part. If you’re good, maybe I’ll tell you about the year we had a “St. Patrick’s Tree�.

Read more about Busy Mom and the adventure of the Busy Family on her personal blog Busy Mom

Posted by mommybloggers at 12:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (9) | TrackBacks (0)